I am a fashion MAVEN

[cjsmith]

wordweaverlynn posted her style rules, which I thought were nifty and keen, and (since she asked her readers) I was inspired to create my own set of rules.

But it didn't really turn out to be a set of rules. It's more like a set of things -- a very, very small set of things -- that I can wear.

Here is why I look so dumpy all the time:

Shirt:

Must be large enough that it does not draw attention to my boobs.
Must not have buttons down the center front - see above.
These two rules taken together mean that my shirts are always knit and incredibly baggy.
Cat hair is optional, but usually present.

Pants:

Must be the only pants in the world that come close to fitting me: Eddie Bauer jeans, with the hips a size bigger than the waist. These come in two colors: blue and blue.

(If I could find them with the hips two sizes bigger than the waist, they would actually fit, and I would probably wear them even into the shower due to overwhelming bliss.)

Socks:

I have recently discovered that boys' socks fit me. These come in one color scheme: white with gray on the bottom. They can be seen in my shower.

Shoes:

These because I can stand up in them and even walk some. They are black, and they look dashing with those white and gray socks sticking out the front.

Comments

[just-cyd.livejournal.com]

if/when i ever learn to knit socks for real (not just start them and then hide them when i make a mistake) i will make you funky-toed socks to show off in your shoes. i'm all about funky socks.

i need to start thinking of cat hair as a fashion accessory. goddess knows it's an essential part of every outfit!

[datagoddess.livejournal.com]

Exactly - CJ, you have friends who know how to knit.

What size is your foot, and are you allergic to wool? Most sock yarns are at least part wool, but that doesn't mean they're super hot or anything. And they can be washed. Or worn in the shower ;-)

I have holiday knitting to finish up, but after that we should talk.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Isn't that... a heck of a lot of work, honestly? I mean, I usually own something like ten pair of socks. They all match, so I don't have to go fishing. They're all washable. How long does it take to make a pair of socks?

(Nope, not at all allergic to wool, THANK GOODNESS. Back when I could hike, the best socks for that were at least part wool.)

[just-cyd.livejournal.com]

sn't that... a heck of a lot of work, honestly?

honestly? no. well, in the pre-xmas crunch, a little bit, but when do i ever NOT have eleventy-seven things on needles??

give me these measurements:

--foot length (heel to toe)
--circumference of foot at the widest spot (and tell me where that is so i know where to make it)
--circumference of your leg just above the ankle bone.

i think that's the critical stuff. i can't promise them this month, but i can get 'em started.

[datagoddess.livejournal.com]

We should send her to an online store and pick out some yarn & colors, too. I bet she's thinking solids, not any of the fun stuff :-D

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Cat hair is totally a fashion accessory! I screwed up, though: I think you're supposed to get cats that MATCH, so that you can then coordinate the cat hair color with your outfits. I have cats ranging from white (half of Duchess) to black (all of Jackie) and everywhere in between (the rest of Duchess and all of Little Girl). The only color I'm missing is orange. :)

[rfrench.livejournal.com]

Since I like that deep red sweater so much, can we get a burgandy cat?

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Sure! YOU get to do the dye job. :-)

[rfrench.livejournal.com]

Cool! I'll see what I can do :-)