My last Monday night square dance

[cjsmith]

As I've probably mentioned here before, I am convinced I must give up square dancing. If my feet are ever going to heal, giving them rest is probably a critical step, and if they're not... I just can't hack it. Last night as an experiment I took six pain pills before dancing. It messed up my stomach. My feet were only somewhat better.

This is the latest of several things I love I've had to give up. Running was first, then backpacking, then hiking; somewhere in there "going to a flea market" or "going to the mall" became not worth it; now square dancing is going.

I dance with a group on Monday nights. Oops, I mean I used to dance with a group on Monday nights. Last night was the last time. I'll miss them. I'm already grieving.

I get to square dance one more time, at a dance in New England, this coming weekend. That one is my swan song.

Letting go is *hard*.

Comments

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

It is very, very, very hard for me to go without exercise like this. It's also very emotionally hard for me to recognize that it's probably permanent. GAAAAAAAAAAAAH. And yeah -- my metabolism has fallen way down. I can't eat like I used to, unless I want to shop for new clothes frequently!

Thanks for the book recommendation. I think it's best for now that I stay away from it. I'm getting awfully tired of, and unreasonably angered by, stories of people who heal. I am not healing and I am insanely jealous of people who do. I think it's healthiest for me right now to quit getting myself riled up.

Good luck with your calf injury. I know how hard it is to take it easy. I hope it heals soon and heals up strong.

[abenn.livejournal.com]

Thanks. We can think good thoughts for each other.

And I can understand you wanting to stay away from another book like that right now. You have to do what's best for your own peace of mind.

I know we're not close; even though we've met and I read your journal I feel like I barely know you. And the South Bay seems so far away most of the time. But I would love to have the chance to get to know you better and get to be better friends, if we can.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Yes! Trading good thoughts is more powerful than using all of my own for me. :-)

I too would like to get to know you better. We are geographically separated a bit, which is a hurdle. Sometimes you come to the South Bay for work or events, yes? I seem to recall something like that. Occasionally I have something in the East, um North, um Northeast Bay too. We'll just need more alertness to such opportunities than we would need if we were next door.