Bridal shower etiquette

[cjsmith]

One of the vet techs at the clinic where I work is getting married soon, and I'm invited to her bridal shower.

I have no idea what gift, if any, to bring. If she is registered on any wedding gift list thingy, I don't know about it. She has mentioned, once, that rather than any material gift she'd rather have help setting up / cleaning up for the party -- but I think she meant the one after the wedding, not the shower. I can't attend the wedding; I'm working (at the clinic!) that day.

I also have no idea what to wear. Keep in mind that there are no pants in the world that fit me except one specific brand of jeans, so that's what I own, and if I'm to wear a dress or skirt, it is going to go with unshaved legs, white ankle socks, and these shoes.

Ideas? Thoughts? Is either of these the kind of question one asks the maid of honor?

Comments

[sharya.livejournal.com]

Having had a couple of recent experiences where the maid of honour was useless and knew nothing, I'd be inclined to ask the bride personally. Sometimes the bride might also include mentioning something like "we are dying for this bedroom furniture set at store XYZ, but it's not on the registry because it's too expensive so I didn't bother." - at which point you can promptly purchase a gift certificate from store XYZ.

It doesn't really matter what you buy, as long as you include a gift receipt. During weddings/showers, there are invariably duplicate gifts no matter how detailed the registry. It was beyond awesome for those people who were organized enough to tape the gift receipt to the gift, as I then had a choice about whether or not to keep, it, and it also sends the message that if it's not the right gift, then it's ok to exchange it for something they want. With people who don't include a gift receipt, you never know if they expect you to cherish their lovely laundry basket forever, or if they spent 5 hours picking out that ugly table cloth and cloth napkins and expect you to die with appreciation over it, or if they just didn't spend any time at all, picked up the first thing they saw, and don't care if you exchange it.

Outfit-wise, I would think as long as you wear a nice shirt, you'll be ok in jeans... provided they're a nice dark-wash jean, and not all faded/distressed and looking like they're 20 years old and old paint clothes.