Cleanup today. Weekend slipping away.

[cjsmith]

I have lots and lots to do around the house today.

Every weekend, I start out with loads of energy, excited about how much I can get done in the two short days I have before I have to go back to work. Yesterday was no exception to this. I crossed a lot of things off my list yesterday. Dishes, laundry, sweeping up, a new ISP for my domain, a bottle of wine ordered from the winery on behalf of my mom, a Craigslist "free" post, new license plates finally attached to the car... stuff.

Now it's Sunday morning, and reality is sinking in. The list is too long for the time remaining. It always is. I'm no longer excited. Now I'm just working against a deadline.

I hate that my life is always right on the edge of being completely out of control because a full-time job takes so much time and energy. When I come home in the evening, I read a book, because that's all I'm good for. The weekends are gold. That's when I can really make a difference.

Lots to do before bedtime, and no staying up late either. Wish me luck.

Comments

[dizzdvl.livejournal.com]

See now that's the problems with lists. They cause stress. If your cats are fed and you are fed and it's mostly clean where someone could stop by and you would be ok with it, then it's clean enough.

Go have a free day! I said so! :)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Ah, but my bills aren't paid and it isn't clean enough for the party we're having soon and I was out of clean socks and if I hadn't switched ISPs my mail would have stopped working on Wednesday. Sometimes I really do kinda need to get stuff done :-(

[dizzdvl.livejournal.com]

Oh see I just buy new socks. It's a bad habit, but I do! I figure I probably need the socks anyway.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha I like that!

[just-cyd.livejournal.com]

i feel your pain. i cram so much into my weekends, i feel like they're lost to the obligations. and if i have fun stuff planned, well, it's no wonder i've got a mountain of laundry and piles of cat hair all over the house.

my favorite list tactic? write down stuff i've already done, just so i can cross something off! :D

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

I love writing stuff down and crossing it off. Sometimes it's just so I have a reminder of what I did all day. Rob comes home and says "So what'd you do?" and if I don't have it down there, I'll forget half of it. But it sure does give a sense of satisfaction, doesn't it? :-)

[platypus]

Working full time makes it very difficult to have a life, or a clean house. I don't know how people do it. I know people who work twelve hours a day at their software jobs, and still go to book clubs and stuff. Me, I put in eight little hours and then I have to make dinner? I can't even bother to download a picture from my camera every day. I haven't vacuumed in months. I keep trying to go to the "just do something useful for fifteen mintues" model, but I can't even stick to that. I'm increasingly tempted by the 4/10 schedule that my new supervisor dangled in front of me; how much tireder could two extra hours a day make me? And then I'd have a three-day weekend, and I might actually get something accomplished and still have time for fun things. I may need to restrict my internet time -- I suspect that's where most of my evenings go. There's very little TV, and I don't write all the entries floating around in my mind, but random websurfing? I do a hell of a lot of that.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Then there's the people who work full time and raise children. Man, I'd consider raising children if I didn't also need an income. Maybe I'm just getting old. (And crippled, thus far less fit.) My energy levels are NOT what they once were.

The fifteen minutes idea is great for jobs that can be done, or at least improved, in fifteen minute chunks. Some jobs take fifteen minutes just to set up. Sewing, f'rex. Man, do I have sewing projects waiting for me! Weekends are too valuable and rare to "waste" on something that doesn't ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO get done.

If you take the 4/10 schedule, can you switch back if you hate it? Me, I'd be VERY tempted to try it.

[sunnydale47.livejournal.com]

I once worked what we used to call a 4/40 schedule (forty hours in four days, ten hours a day, same as 4/10) and I loved it. For the first two weeks or so I was really tired at the end of each day, but the 3-day weekend perked me up. Once I got used to the 10-hour days, they didn't really feel any longer than the 8-hour days used to, so the permanent 3-day weekends seemed like a free bonus. Plus, since I had a very long commute, I had an extra bonus of 3 additional hours in the day on Fridays!

It reduced stress tremendously -- partly because of the 20% reduction in commuting, but more because I had peace of mind when scheduling appointments with doctors, dentists, car mechanics, etc., etc., since I didn't have to try to figure out what would be happening at work a week or a month from now, and whether I'd be able to be out of the office then. Shopping was much less onerous on Fridays when the stores were less crowded. I could take "long weekend" vacations on non-holiday weekends when others weren't traveling. When I got married I loved having the house all to myself one day each week. I could get the chores out of the way and be able to relax on the "regular" weekend -- or I could make it a personal day just for myself, without having to take anyone else's needs or desires into account, and do the stuff I had to do on Saturday and Sunday.

There were just so many things I loved about the 4/40 workweek, with very little downside once I got used to it.

Of course, that was when I was young (in my 20s) and healthy, and I didn't get tired as easily. I could never manage a 10-hour workday now (although that's not a fair observation since I can't manage an 8-hour workday now either!) But at the time I was really amazed at how little difference there was in the way I felt at the end of the day after the first couple of weeks.

Why not find out if there's an option to go back to 5/40 (or 5/8 or whatever the standard schedule is called) -- if there is, there's no reason not to give the 4/10 schedule a try. If it has to be a permanent change, give it some more thought -- but do seriously consider it.

[platypus]

Thanks for telling me about your experiences -- I'm really going to consider it. It doesn't have to be a permanent alteration; in fact, our library's policy on alternative work schedules is that they're approved on an annual basis, depending on the needs of the department. Since my new department doesn't have to staff a public service desk, it's much more flexible with things like this. My new boss's comment came in the form of "I'd prefer you to work a five-day week for now, while you're being trained," but that strongly implies that switching would be possible once I'm settled in.

I've been working a staggered week, Sunday-Thursday, for all six years I've been at the library. I've very much liked having a weekday off, for all the reasons you've mentioned (ironically, though, no dentist in San Diego works on Fridays, so it didn't help with my dental stuff). It's also been a bit rough having only one day a week off with Ken, but at the same time I really like having a day off on my own. I've always thought a permanent three-day weekend would be an excellent solution.

Working a ten-hour day would also require me to get up very early and get myself to work, though; I'd like to still end my workday at the same time as Ken so we could have dinner together. Our mornings rarely involve much interaction, but I'd have to go to bed earlier and part of the appeal of the new job is that it doesn't have stringent hours. Of course, if I start sleeping in and going to work at 10am and needing to work until 6:30 or 7pm, I'm just going to be unhappy about that as well. And Ken, I suspect, doesn't much care either way as long as I don't ask him to get up at some ungodly hour.

If I try the new schedule and like it, it might be a nice carrot for them to use to keep me in the position. I doubt I could get such an arrangement if I went for the Reserves Supervisor position next summer.

[nosrednayduj]

I don't have 8 hours of brain cells available, let alone 10. I really only have 6 hours of brain cells. My code gets useless and my debugging skills drain out my ear. Unless I'm watching grass grow like I did this weekend (big fileserver reorg, lots of time waiting for file transfers) I can't work 40 hours in a week.

About 10 years ago I went to 6 hour days, cut out doing personal email/internet at my job, and my productivity went UP, and I had more time for both chores and fun. I did it unilaterally and talked to my boss 3 mos later -- I said if he could tell me when I'd done it (I usually left after him, which is how I could get away with it), I'd go back to 40 hrs. But he agreed I was just as productive so we'd leave it alone and not even tell HR. That was nice, still collecting the big bucks.

Then when there were layoffs 3 years later(I survived TWO layoffs at parttime, so that's not why they laid me off) and I needed another job it was hard to convince the new company it would work, so they lowballed me in salary, but I asked them to give me a big raise after a year if they felt it was working, and they did. Since then they've put up with extraordinary part-time-ness after my twins were born (10 hrs/week for the first year, gradually ramping up to about 20 now, and the kids are 4), and my demand to be hourly instead of salaried.

I LOVE being hourly. If I work, I get paid. If I don't work, I don't feel guilty. It takes more effort to manage my deadlines, so it may not work for everyone, but it makes me a very happy camper.

[canseefour.livejournal.com]

I sympathize - this is our first "free" weekend since Labour Day so I'm plowing through all kinds of odd jobs.

Over the years I've learned one way to seem more successful is to make shorter lists. I focus on the "absolutely must do" items - like paying bills, laundry, etc. Sometimes I can get a small item completed during the week and that seems to help a lot.

Good luck to both of us in being able to tick off those items.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

I remember a stretch of oh, six or eight weeks or so when we had EXACTLY ONE weekend at home without houseguests. That was the weekend my car was totaled. When I look back on a period of time like that one, I realize that of course it is possible to get laundry done on a work night or pay bills in short chunks of time. Why don't I do that more? I just feel exhausted....

Yes indeed, good luck to both of us!

[sunnydale47.livejournal.com]

Physical challenges make life much more difficult. Pain makes everything -- even fun stuff -- stressful. Things take longer if you have to get off your feet and rest periodically. That's on top of the time-pressure everyone feels in our time-pressured society, where "keeping up with the Joneses" means not just acquisitions, but also activities.

Shortly after Tom and I got married and moved to Maryland, when I wasn't working yet, we went to a B&B one weekend. At breakfast the woman beside me and I introduced ourselves, and she asked brightly, "What do you do?" "I'm at home with my 2-year-old," I said. "Oh. Uh, that's nice," she said tonelessly, and before I could say another word about what I used to do, or what I planned to do, she turned away to talk the person on her other side.

That's where the idea for my airplane-sales business came from. I needed to have something to be, because, especially in those early years of the women's movement, it simply wasn't acceptable in the power-mad DC area to not "do" anything. (Staying at home with one's kids wasn't considered doing anything, regardless of how much work it entailed, or what else you did with your time.) It's a little more socially acceptable to be a stay-at-home mom now (it even has its own acronym) -- but if you don't have kids you're still expected to "do" something.

For many years now I've been responding to that question with "I'm medically retired," feeling the need to add the adverb because I was too young to be retired any other way, and felt I needed an excuse for not working because society equates productivity and success to paid work. But there are other forms of productivity and success. Raising a child is being productive. Calling square-dances is being productive. The joy and sense of accomplishment from being able to do aerobatics is achieving success in life.

The most intense pressure comes from a full-time job, because you can always skip something else if you need to. Your party guests won't care if the bookcases are a little dusty or you haven't scrubbed the splashback behind the sink -- most of them won't even notice, and the rest will feel relieved because their houses aren't perfect either. You can cancel a flight or skip writing. You can even let LJ go for awhile (though there's a mental-health downside to that since it's an important support system for you). But you have to be at work -- and be productive -- day in and day out, 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, 49 or 50 weeks a year. So it's the biggest stress-producer in terms of not only quantity, but also quality. Even if you love your job, the unceasing nature of its demands are wearing.

Is there any possibility of cutting back your hours? If you tell them you just can't work full-time because of your physical disabilities, I think they have to let you set a shorter schedule ... and since you're appreciated there, they'd probably prefer to have you working fewer hours than lose you altogether.

Is it possible to work 4 days a week instead of 5 (without increasing the number of hours per day), or 6-7 hours a day instead of 8? I think that would make a big difference in your stress level.

If not, you may have to revisit the idea that you've been wrestling with for a long time: Cutting out one or two of your many activities. I have BTDT on this one, and I well know how terribly painful it is ... but it also reduces stress enormously once you come to acceptance of the loss.

Meanwhile, I hope you get everything done that you planned for this weekend and still get a little time to rest and refresh yourself to start the week tomorrow!

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

For me it's less pain and more lack of energy, which I suppose is an indirect result of the foot pain (no exercise). I'm not in a state where I can/must mess about with my job. I can do the work. I just can't do it and everything else I want to do.

The only activity I have left that takes any real time, besides playing host when people are staying over, is square dance calling. It's my only social life. For good or ill, I think I'd rather have stressful/busy weekends than cut that.

My dream is to retire. I'm working at startups, I'm investing... some day I might make it.

[wooddragon.livejournal.com]

It sucks when one's down time is stressful. Maybe you can find a way to make that not-so... (maybe the lists DON'T help. Maybe they just highlight how much needs to be done ZOMG right now.)

I'm working hourly now, 9 hour days with every other Friday off. I didn't go for the 4/10 because I was concerned after 14 months of not working that I couldn't do 10 hours.

Turns out 10 hours is pretty easy when there's a lot to do (the types of things I need to do are generally varied enough that one thing provides a 'break' from anohter)...

I LOVE getting odd Fridays off. I would also love every Friday off.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Well, there's a payoff, too; if I get stuff done on the weekend, I can start the work week with a sense of pleasure and accomplishment. I think you're right that making a long list isn't beneficial. If I can do all the "maintenance" I need AND make some small step toward long-term improvement (eg get rid of that icky couch, upgrade a hard drive, whatever) it feels really good.

Your schedule sounds awesome. Heck, I work 9 hour days a lot of the time anyway. It'd be great if that bought me odd Fridays off!

[wooddragon.livejournal.com]

Regarding weekends, a few friends of mine (and Dave adopted this) would only do life maintenance crap on weeknights. Bill paying, laundry, vaccuuming, whatever. Why save up all the crap chores for the weekend and ruin 'em?

I agree, after work I am pretty tired, so this doesn't always work for me. But theoretically it makes lots of sense.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Yeah, theoretically it does make a lot of sense. Maybe my real problem is that I need my weeknight down-time so badly.

[airporter.livejournal.com]

Speaking as one who was folding clothes, importing music and reviewing notes for class at 11:30 last night, I understand.

I got about 1/4 of my list done on the weekend. Actually, given the last few weeks, that's not bad. Hmm.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

I know the feeling! At least if we go through the lists in priority order, we've done the best we can with the time we had. That's not too awful.