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August 10th, 2005

cjsmith: (caduceus)
Wednesday, August 10th, 2005 11:30 am
Post-op appointment this morning. My doctor changed the bandages wrapped all over the outside of my foot but didn't touch the surgical tape over the actual incision. I took a picture, of course (edit: for upload tonight). My feet don't look very pretty. They're orange, wrinkled, and a little bit bruised. They are also starting to smell like feet. Wow did it ever feel good to have clean cotton wrapped around them! I got clean booties, too, and what's more, I got permission to WASH the booties! Oh heaven!
cjsmith: (Default)
Wednesday, August 10th, 2005 08:29 pm
Surgery recovery has involved getting help from people in various ways. I, raised to be independent and fiercely self-reliant, am not comfortable on the receiving-help side of things. I'm not necessarily good at receiving help gracefully, I'm not happy knowing I need (or would be far better off with) it, and I'm not skilled at negotiating how best to meet my needs *and* those of my helper.

Surgery recovery has involved me talking a helluva lot and other people listening a helluva lot. I seem to have a bottomless need/desire to be heard and understood. I'm simultaneously trying to remain within the bounds of socially acceptable behavior (eg don't take over the whole conversation at lunch) while basking in this listening that others are giving me like a gift. I wonder what it would be like to have that need/desire of mine fully met? How would I act once I'd gotten there? Would I listen more and listen better to others? Could be.

During this time I've been more comfortable doing unusual things in order to take care of myself a little. Foot aches? Fine, prop it right up there on the desk next to my keyboard. Tired? Go ahead and put my head down on my arms for a few breaths, even at work during working hours. Why am I less willing to do these things when I haven't had foot surgery recently? There's nothing wrong with them. Customers don't walk past my desk. There are no rules about posture for the engineer types while we're in our little dens.

Interesting.
cjsmith: (Default)
Wednesday, August 10th, 2005 10:29 pm
My foot surgery photo gallery has new pictures in it. To see the new ones without seeing images that might bother some folk, start here (the first new picture), do "next" until you see the shower picture, then stop.