Wow

I just saw a snippet of a journal entry that really resonated with me. I won't quote it verbatim nor name the source since I haven't yet asked for permission for either, but here is the gist: "I want children with another woman, a strong butch woman who will let me do the femmy things."

And I thought, gawd, wouldn't that be awesome? There are days when I am deeply angry at myself for being sexually attracted to men in the slightest. It would be so much easier to choose the gender role I want if I weren't so damn nearly straight.

Good weekend

Spent the weekend in Sacramento dancing C4. Amazingly enough, I wasn't the worst person there. Finally, finally, I am improving! I am making progress! Need more floor time. Studying helps little now. I need to see the formations and the solutions more quickly.

I am probably willing to call myself "a C4 dancer" now. A bad one, still, to be sure. But no longer only a wannabe. Progress.

Augh! Grr!

My jeans are getting too big! Four pairs of 'em, and they were practically brand new. Crap! I must must must eat more. Otherwise I'm going to have to go clothes shopping again, and I detest clothes shopping. I especially dislike shopping for jeans. It is so hard to find jeans that fit.

Oh, hey, maybe the leather pants fit now. Hmmmmm. That might make it worth shopping for jeans. Decisions, decisions! Maybe my jeans would shrink in a REALLY HOT dryer. They just better not get much shorter.