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cjsmith ([personal profile] cjsmith) wrote2002-10-31 03:59 pm
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Realization

I wouldn't respect myself if I deliberately took the good end of an unfair deal. If I knew that's what it was and I took it, I wouldn't respect that. That's not the kind of friend or partner I want to be.

So, no wonder I don't often wind up with the good end of unfair deals. And no wonder I am shocked or hurt or judgmental when someone I otherwise respect wants to do [what APPEARS to me to be] exactly that.

Duh.

(What portions of this can I let go of?)
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[identity profile] wldrose.livejournal.com 2002-10-31 04:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Welcome to the HIGH HORSE CLUB

Great view, but uncomfortable.

I am a founding member.

Ash

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2002-10-31 04:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Yah, I think I've been up here so long my butt has gone numb.

Re:

[identity profile] wldrose.livejournal.com 2002-10-31 05:01 pm (UTC)(link)
the thing is I have never understood those folks on the ground, has caused lots of probs.

Ash
firecat: red panda, winking (Default)

[personal profile] firecat 2002-10-31 06:56 pm (UTC)(link)
I wouldn't respect myself if I deliberately took the good end of an unfair deal.

Ooh, I recognize that T-shirt.

In fact, it's in an entire drawer full of T-shirts about "holding back" in general.

It's not that I feel unworthy, it's just that I don't feel I'm more worthy than other people. But then if someone comes along who does...

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2002-11-01 09:55 am (UTC)(link)
It's not that I feel unworthy, it's just that I don't feel I'm more worthy than other people. But then if someone comes along who does...

Bingo. That hits the nail on the head.

[identity profile] rmjwell.livejournal.com 2002-10-31 08:43 pm (UTC)(link)
How is the deal unfair? I mean, if a person comes up to me and makes me an offer that looks great for me and sucky for them, I'll restate the terms to make sure I heard them. If they want to go forward with it, how do I know what all they are getting out of it?

At some point, I've got to assume I'm dealing with people that don't need to have someone watch out for them.o

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2002-11-01 09:57 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, no, people aren't offering me the good end of the deal. They're offering the bad end, and being genuinely disappointed and confused and sometimes hurt that I don't want it. If I were in their position, I like to think that I would at least try to make it more fair.
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