Stuff Done

[cjsmith]

Lyme results sent to my local GP.
Lyme results sent to New York doctor.
Consent-to-treatment form sent to diagnosing doctor.
Minor Web research done; reply on this subject e-mailed to my family.
Appointment set up with diagnosing doctor for day after tomorrow.

I feel like a poser saying this has any emotional impact, because basically, for a 17-year Lyme patient (if indeed that's truly what I am), I'm incredibly healthy. Still, it kinda does.

Think I should do some work related to my job now?

Comments

[hopeforyou.livejournal.com]

I don't think you're a poser because if Lyme has been a big reason why your feet have caused you pain, then I would think it HAS had an impact on you emotionally. Heck, just trying to track down the cause of physical problems comes with a certain amount of stress and frustration.

I am glad you are incredibly healthy, all told, if you have had Lyme for 17 years. I'm tickled for you. The thing that is so insidious about the whole thing is you can't be sure when it started, because the spirochetes can go into a dormant phase and not cause any problems at all for ages (see syphilis -- it is genetically less complex, but behaves similarly).

It's a weird bug, and it behaves differently in different people. You may be one of the luckier ones if your symptoms are only somewhat annoying on a sporadic basis. YMMV.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Oh, definitely, I'm not putting myself down for the foot thing... just for being all "Hey LOOK I have LYME and that's a BIG EFFING DEAL" when really for me (except for the feet, connection as yet shaky and unsupported) it hasn't been. Yet the name alone still feels big. I don't know if that's making much sense.

Of course I can't be sure when it started, but I do know when I was and when I was not running around in Lyme-tick-infested woods and pulling multiple ticks per day out of my skin. :-) The Army isn't about to give me any medical benefits on the strength of that, but the circumstantial evidence does kind of lean toward one time frame. It's the best guess I've got.

[quasigeostrophy.livejournal.com]

I feel like a poser saying this has any emotional impact

You react how you react, and that's just you. IMHO, it doesn't make you a poser if you're not having the amount of emotional reaction some might have. I don't react to a lot of things "normally".

Think I should do some work related to my job now?

Nah. ;-)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Nah. ;-)

Hee. I went to lunch instead -- catered by my job. Maybe NOW it's time to do some work in return. :-) :-)

[jupiter29.livejournal.com]

I think any possible explanation for what you have been dealing with would have an amazingly strong emotional impact, so there's no poser-ness (what??) going on there.

As for work, I wouldn't recommend it. My experience is that they just keep giving you more. :) It's actually much more fun to talk to your LJ friends. ;)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

That giving you more work thing, they've got to cut that out. Where's the motivation if they keep doing that? :-)

[jupiter29.livejournal.com]

I try to keep telling them that, but they won't listen to me. Think you could write a note for me? :)

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

I hope this leads to some good outcomes. I understand and sympathize with the "maybe THIS will explain it" vibe. The hope, the despair, the despair over the hope, etc. I am crossing all available appendages on your behalf, and hoping that appropriate treatment might bring miracles your way.

(hug)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

The hope, the despair, the despair over the hope, etc.

Yes indeedy. It's funny how the world becomes divided, when you've been through something like that, into those who get it and those who don't. It's so strong a perception that I'm tempted to pull out that old cliche' and say that the last five years have changed my whole sense of priorities. Of course, I was kind of an oddball to begin with, so I can't really lean too hard on a soundbite like that even if it does sound all spiffy and profound. :-)

[just-cyd.livejournal.com]

that's a lot to get done. for some crazy reason, this little exchange is popping up in my head:

Prince Humperdinck: [sincerely] Tyrone, you know how much I love watching you work, but I've got my country's 500th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder and Guilder to frame for it; I'm swamped.

Count Rugen: Get some rest. If you haven't got your health, then you haven't got anything.

meaning that you should by all means avoid working at all costs. :)

(figured it out!)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

That's what I forgot to do! Murder somebody and frame a neighboring country! Dang it, I knew I'd forgotten something big. I bet I've missed the deadline, too.

As it turns out, I made a huge breakthrough at work this afternoon. I was overdue for one, which is always frustrating and annoying because I sort of feel like I haven't done anything for days, but being overdue never guarantees I'm going to get there. I'm feeling pretty good that I did. Now it's Miller time.

...well, okay: in an hour or so, not now, and it'll be a glass of good red wine, not beer. :-)

[lkeele.livejournal.com]

Of course it has an emotional impact. You're certainly not a poser. You'd be weird if this information *didn't* effect you emotionally.

*hugs*

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

I'm probably so used to burying it all just so I can get things done that it surprises me when something leaks through.

Thanks, Doc! ;-) (sorry -- I could NOT resist!)