Thursday, March 13th, 2008 08:51 pm
Hey, anybody ever try to make fondue and not get a nice smooth goo?

I figured out one way to screw up fondue, and how to fix it.

I'm still not friends with my cheese grater, so I simply chopped the cheese this time. I made lots of long thin strips, figuring that was close enough, then tossed it in flour to coat it as usual and made fondue out of it. The larger pieces melted more slowly than grated cheese, but I just stood there stirring for a longer time and counted it a good tradeoff compared to grating.

What I wound up with was an unappetizing-looking mess. It was as if somebody had taken a white wine, made it just a little cloudy, and then put a million tiny cheese larvae in it. Seriously, if cheese had an insectoid life cycle, my "fondue" was teeming with the larval form. It was not smooth. It was not fully opaque. When I dipped a piece of bread in it, some of the bread piece looked wet and some looked cheesy. The whole thing looked just like it would if I had only added about half or three-quarters the amount of cheese that I'd needed.

I looked again at the measuring cup I'd used for the wine. That was right. I looked at the labels I'd peeled off the cheese. Those were right. What could I possibly have done differently?

Less surface area -> less flour to coat the cheese.

Well, there could be only one way to fix it. I pulled out the flour, dumped two heaping spoons of it into the mess, and beat it vigorously with a whisk.

I have never, in my entire life, seen a cooking goof that looked so bad be fixed so perfectly in such a short time. In about thirty seconds what I had was fondue.

I guess the flour isn't optional.

[livejournal.com profile] klwalton, [livejournal.com profile] tytso, and anybody else who's knowledgeable about the WHY of various cooking techniques: what is it about the flour that does this? For someone allergic to wheat or to gluten, what might work instead, for swiss-cheese-and-wine fondue?
Friday, March 14th, 2008 03:57 am (UTC)
Apparently it's the starch that counts, not the gluten. (I have a feeling that those tiny cheese larvae were still there, just invisible in the starchy/glutinous mass.) Here's a link to a wheat-free fondue recipe: http://www.elise.com/recipes/archives/004308cheese_fondue.php
Friday, March 14th, 2008 04:05 am (UTC)
Ah! So cornstarch would work, then, as I had half-guessed (but didn't want to test with $30 worth of cheese). :) Thanks for the link!
Friday, March 14th, 2008 04:11 am (UTC)
I used to use corn starch exclusively. Then a friend of mine discovered her corn allergy. Now I use rice flour.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:02 pm (UTC)
Wow, rice flour. OK, it really is the starch, and nothing to do with gluten or bran or anything else weird. Awesome. Starch can be found in so many places!
Friday, March 14th, 2008 04:15 am (UTC)
OMG. The cheese larval stage got to me.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:08 am (UTC)
OMG. May I steal that icon???
Friday, March 14th, 2008 07:06 am (UTC)
Sure -- you might check my icon list for whom to credit. It's not one I made myself.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:26 pm (UTC)
Yeah, that description is about as appetizing as the not-quite-fondue was.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 04:19 am (UTC)
It's the starch. You could use cornstarch.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:27 pm (UTC)
That is good to know!

Man, I was really starting to wonder, there, what in the world I had done.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:08 am (UTC)
The starch in the flour keeps the cheese in suspension in the liquid. You could use cornstarch or rice flour or even potato starch (although you have to be careful because each kind of starch requires a different measure). In exactly the same way that, when making a macaroni and cheese, you make a bechamel (milk, butter and flour sauce) first, then melt the cheese into the bechamel. It keeps the cheese from separating out of the sauce.

Friday, March 14th, 2008 07:41 am (UTC)
when are we using my mother in law's recipe and your fondue pot?!

:) (no rush. i understand life has a way of taking over time priorities)
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:27 pm (UTC)
Plz plz invite me! :-D
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:35 pm (UTC)
Of course!
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:34 pm (UTC)
After Danny's off and after my tax appointment, hell, yes. And we need a silly movie as well (I have several :)).
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:28 pm (UTC)
although you have to be careful because each kind of starch requires a different measure

Ahhh. O'course, you could just add until it starts to work, right? As I sort-of did with my not-quite-fondue last night?
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:36 pm (UTC)
I usually start with about half as much as the amount of flour and work with it until I get the result I want. Potato starch kicked my butt, once, though :).
Friday, March 14th, 2008 06:28 pm (UTC)
I can imagine cooking for wheat-allergic people, so this is good info for me. Does potato starch need to be in a much smaller dose?
Friday, March 14th, 2008 06:30 am (UTC)
The recipe I used once had corn starch. I usually cheat and get the premade stuff.
I actually have a 1970s avocado colored electric fondue pot, complete with forks with little colored buttons on the top, so you can tell whose is whose. We usually use it for chocolate fondue. :D
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:06 pm (UTC)
The premade stuff is not half bad. Sadly it's something like one serving in there! (Yeah, they SAY four... or maybe it's just that I adore cheese.)

What was it with the 1970s and avocado as a color? That and dark-mustard-yellow. I can't count the number of refrigerators I've had, in rental places, that were in those two 1970s colors.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 07:23 pm (UTC)
I usually get several boxes. :D
As for avocado and sickly yellow. First, They Weren't White. Second they hid dirt better. Women were just getting liberated and hated appliances that needed a ton of maintenance. For some reason those colors were popular.
Me? My big appliances were Eggshell (off white). Still didn't show the dirt and were less like to Date Badly. Which is a good thing since I still have the stove. Since I got electronic ignition, the stove actually hasn't gotten too old style to need replacement yet.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 09:56 pm (UTC)
I like off-white. Just as you say, it doesn't show dirt as much as white and it isn't suddenly unfashionable in ten years.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 10:21 am (UTC)
if you don't like the taste of cornstarch, use arrowroot instead.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:04 pm (UTC)
Arrowroot? I am trying to think of where I have ever used arrowroot, but I'm failing. The word is familiar though.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 04:33 pm (UTC)
Would tater flour work?

(mmmm fondue with new potatoes!)
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:04 pm (UTC)
Sounds like it would, from all I can tell here. It's the starch!
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:00 pm (UTC)
Heeheeheeheeheehee.

Sorry, I'm not laughing at your situation. Just the title, "Flour Isn't Optional", sets me off. I believe you are familiar with the legend of a mutual acquaintance who made "brownies" once?
Friday, March 14th, 2008 05:03 pm (UTC)
Hee! Yes. And I did the same with carrot cake once (for thirty people, no less) and managed to save it by pulling the heated-but-not-cooked-yet goo out of the oven and adding the flour.
Friday, March 14th, 2008 07:02 pm (UTC)
Timing is everything: You must be on the roof before you get naked...
Friday, March 14th, 2008 09:58 pm (UTC)
Ah yes: that's one thing carrot cakes and deer rifles have in common. Timing is, indeed, crucial.