cjsmith: (Default)
cjsmith ([personal profile] cjsmith) wrote2008-02-01 10:56 am

baa

I mostly hate memes, but I've seen some hilarious incarnations of this one. I shall strive to do justice to it. Here goes:

Ask me a question. I'll tell you a lie.

[identity profile] ericsilverbear.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Will you sleep with me?

{{snickers}}

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:09 pm (UTC)(link)
I should in all fairness let you know that I snore like an asthmatic lion.

[identity profile] rfrench.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 01:24 am (UTC)(link)
Wait, you're suppose to lie, aren't you?

Or is that lay?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 01:34 am (UTC)(link)
The reader can make his own decisions as to my honesty.

(It's Frito.)

[identity profile] ladycelia.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Pirates or Ninjas?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Bringing it a bit more up to date, I predict one hundred years before people are asking "Slavers or Genociders?" We'll have Talk like a Pimp Day and an Ask a Nazi podcast.
ext_3386: (Default)

[identity profile] vito-excalibur.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 04:13 pm (UTC)(link)
This is one of my favorite comments ever.

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-03 02:33 am (UTC)(link)
I blame my coworker. (She claims pirates win, but she was a technical architect for Napster, so I contend that she is biased.)

[identity profile] fuzzygruf.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Are you kidding me?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:28 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm the GOOD twin.

[identity profile] erikred.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Why did you give up flying?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:30 pm (UTC)(link)
On one of my long solo flights I stopped at an airport along the north coast, a beautiful little place, and I met this guy...

It was so sweet while it lasted, but when it ended I was heartbroken. I couldn't bear to look at an airplane again.

[identity profile] quasigeostrophy.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Why is the sky blue?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:27 pm (UTC)(link)
It turned color in the sixties, and it was pretty grainy for a while there, too.

[identity profile] elflet.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 05:30 am (UTC)(link)
So you represent the lollypop guild?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 05:35 am (UTC)(link)
They kicked me out. I'm... *sob*... too short!

[identity profile] platypuslord.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Where did I leave my cellphone?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
I, uh... well, it's, uh...

...under my bed. When you were hiding there that time Rob walked in.

[identity profile] rfrench.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 01:25 am (UTC)(link)
Well at least it was nice and clean after the Roomba got through with it.

[identity profile] datagoddess.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 07:39 pm (UTC)(link)
What's your favorite thing to do?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 08:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Rule all within my view, with a benevolent hand.

Evil twin, eh?

[identity profile] airporter.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 08:05 pm (UTC)(link)
K. What's the most unusual place you've done "it?"

(Breathlessly awaiting the lie...)

Re: Evil twin, eh?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 08:08 pm (UTC)(link)
That would be in my left ear, Bob.

Re: Evil twin, eh?

[identity profile] ericsilverbear.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 08:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, she mentioned that little airport along the Northcoast... Shelter Cove, it was. There is a part of the tarmac overlooking the beach. Her world was rocked as the waves crashed against the rocky shore. All I can say is that I'm still pulling gravel out of my bum.

[identity profile] deege.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Do square dance phantoms feel pain when I step on them?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 09:37 pm (UTC)(link)
They scream in agony. Phantoms are the condemned souls of square dancers who have sinned.

[identity profile] airporter.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Oy, I'm in deep then. :)

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 01:35 am (UTC)(link)
I on the other hand have never made a mistake while square dancing!

[identity profile] fyellin.livejournal.com 2008-02-03 12:02 am (UTC)(link)
Why does the phantom always get to my spot before I do? Who do I politely ask him/her/it to move?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-03 04:38 am (UTC)(link)
Let's face it: you're just slow.

In square dancing there are two groups of people: the quick and the dead. So... hey, Frank, how do I politely ask a phantom to move?

[identity profile] shoutingboy.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 11:31 pm (UTC)(link)
What's the best concert you've ever gone to?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-01 11:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, without question, the first time Mozart played his own K.386 alternate rondo, in late 1782. What style he had! What empathy with the audience! I brought Ronald Neame with me, and I hope that that concert may have had some influence on the score chosen for one of his movies.

[identity profile] jcgbigler.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 02:30 am (UTC)(link)
How would you respond to this question in response to this meme?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
I couldn't possibly respond at all in any way.

[identity profile] drdaly.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
Have you stopped beating Rob yet?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 04:55 am (UTC)(link)
No.

[identity profile] fyellin.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 05:49 am (UTC)(link)
Where is Jimmy Hoffa buried?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-03 02:31 am (UTC)(link)
In Grant's tomb. Duh.

[personal profile] apparentparadox 2008-02-02 06:56 am (UTC)(link)
What's your favorite color?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-03 07:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Blooooooood.
brooksmoses: (Default)

[personal profile] brooksmoses 2008-02-02 08:20 am (UTC)(link)
Who are you?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-03 04:41 am (UTC)(link)
I am the Queen of Charm and Strange. (Earlier I was Princess of Top and Bottom. You wouldn't BELIEVE the weight loss program. I feel so free!)

[identity profile] allanh.livejournal.com 2008-02-02 06:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Are you telling the truth now?

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-03 02:32 am (UTC)(link)
Yes, of course!

[identity profile] jupiter29.livejournal.com 2008-02-08 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
What are you wearing?


Oh, no, wait, that's what I asking when people promise to tell me the truth. ;)

[identity profile] cjsmith.livejournal.com 2008-02-18 08:35 pm (UTC)(link)
A chain mail bikini!

[identity profile] jupiter29.livejournal.com 2008-02-18 09:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Too bad it's not the day to toss all recycables. :)