Adulthood

[cjsmith]

This goes around LJ every so often, and it's always fun for me to think about it. This time a friend made a locked post (credit given on request :-) ) and asked what sorts of things made folks feel like adults. Not the obvious biggies necessarily -- kids, mortgage -- but the random small stuff. What has made you feel like an adult?

Here are some for me, in roughly chronological order.

- The time I struck a karate pose when my mother was about to hit me, and she didn't. (Age maybe eleven.)

- The day I checked into a hotel.

- Being called "Madame" (instead of "Mademoiselle") while I lived in France.

- The day I passed the "adoption check" to take home a kitten from a picky shelter.

- The year or so wherein I gradually realized I would never be able to run or hike or dance or ride a bicycle again.

- The day I bought a bottle of schnapps. (Age 38 or thereabouts.)

In some ways, too, I still don't feel like an adult. There are probably more of these moments in my future.

Comments

[ladycelia.livejournal.com]

I first felt like an adult when I bought a 3/8" power drill.
Needing my own power tools--that meant I was a grown-up.

[plymouth.livejournal.com]

I think the main thing was the realization that I now voluntarily do the chores that I always hated my mom for making me do - like vacuum and clean the bathroom and compost. Especially that last one since it is TOTALLY voluntary - I could just throw the stuff away.

My most recent thoughts on the subject

[spindle-rose.livejournal.com]

http://spindlerose.typepad.com/adventures/2007/04/being_a_grownup.html

Re: My most recent thoughts on the subject

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Yes indeed. I wanted to put something in my list about responsibility and chores, or even just doing the right thing rather than the easy thing, but I couldn't think of a defining moment: there was no "the first time I _____" that came to mind. But that's definitely a big part of what being an adult means to me. Some days I get all self-righteous about it and other days I just wish I could go play in the sprinklers all afternoon like I used to!

[mithriltabby]

When I wrote my first check for an apartment I was living in in college, with no roommates, and the money earned by my summer job.

[joedecker.livejournal.com]

Moving into my first apartment. (1984)

Deciding to leave my first full-time job. (1991)

Taking my first solo road trip to Death Valley and Great Basin circa
1990, that may also have been the first time I checked into a hotel
solo.

Buying the first car I really "bought" (1991 or '92)

Carrying [name omitted] to the ER, later working to get her records medical transferred to another facility. (c. 2000?)

Accepting a position on the board of directors of Impact. Also, deciding to stay during the Great Unpleasantness that followed. (c. 2001?)

Various points where I "took responsibilty" for investing the wealth I'd gotten as a result of the Liberate IPO (2000-2002)

Starting my own business (2002)

Leading my first photography workshop (2004)

[gdmusumeci.livejournal.com]

Filling in the blank space for "next of kin."

[dizzdvl.livejournal.com]

I think it was just a few weeks ago. I started making fun of teenagers. Actually at them to fluster them. And I giggled insanely when I realized their reaction was exactly like my reaction at that age. That's so funny to me, and I now understand why my much older siblings tormented me so. It's funny!

There is a whole generation of black eyelinered footstomping kids out there waiting for me to get to them! Muahahaha!

Seriously.

And there was an incident when my friend was in line at a restaurant near a high school and I walked up to where she was in front of a ton of teenagers on lunch and not one single one of them even gave me a dirty look. Weird.

[rampling.livejournal.com]

• Being told to watch over my mom and sister for a summer [age 18] (1981) Including:
  • Physically restraining my mom from 'spanking' me
    
  • Actually succeeding a bit in protecting my sister
  
  
• Paying income taxes (1985)
  
  
• Flying with my mom, spur of the moment, to Puerto Rico, on a quest to find my sister there. I decided to go moreso to watch over my mom than for the quest. We actually went to likely places and showed her picture, just like on TV! We found her, much to my surprise! (~1986)
  
  
• First solo business trip, to Orlando, getting very sick upon arrival, having to deal with the consequences alone [very alone!] (1986)
  
  
• Buying my dream car, my beloved 1985 Fiero (~1987)
  
  
• Deciding that divorce was the right thing to do (1998) -- made me closer to my mom, 'cause then we had that in common!
  
  
• Taking active control of barriers to my grad school progress (~1993)
  
  
• Dealing with clearances (~1994)
  
  
• Paying my Mom's rent when she couldn't (1998)
  
  
• Deciding I could go to one of those parties (2000)
  
  
• Adopting a kitten, Mira (2001) -- My sister said "Wow you're all grown up now!"
  
  
• Giving a presentation on Girlfags at the Vancouver Bi Conference -- I'm an "international lecturer" on a topic I came up with myself! :) (2001)
  
  
• Spinal Neck Tumor Sttuff (2004) Including:
  • Filing for disability when my spinal neck tumor prevented me from working
    
  • Filling out the DNR forms before spinal neck surgery
    
  • Relying on "chosen family" (my sister plus friends) to help me get through the nastiest parts of dealing with my spinal neck tumor
    
  • Ensuring that Mira would be cared for when I was too ill to even feed her
  
  
• Getting to decide "I wanna fly to India", and making it happen (2005)
  

[lkeele.livejournal.com]

Here's one that happened to me day before yesterday. I brought my tamagotchi to class, because, ahem, my mickey mouse watch broke, and my tamagotchi has a clock. I dropped it, because I'm a complete klutz when I teach.

A student on the front row asked, "Is that a tamagotchi?" with excitement in his voice. Here's the adult part: in the recent past, I would have said "Yeah, version 2, this is my 16th generation on this particular toy, though we had a problem about four generations ago and had to reset." Or something. Instead, I felt *embarrassed* to be caught playing with a toy, and found I couldn't answer simple questions like, "what species? what's her name?", and instead just handed the thing over for examination by the curious party while I did something else.

Embarrassed by my own (non-sexual) toys. That's a new one on me. Does it mean I'm growing up? Or that I'm just being weird?