Stress

[cjsmith]

Overwhelmed. Overwhelmed. Overwhelmed. Deer in headlights. Mind running in frantic little circles. Failing to do even the simplest useful thing.

I hate this.

Deep breath. Time to list what I've done right today:
- Remembered to bring a bunch of crap in to work (stuff that's been waiting to come in for days).
- Made sure to talk to architect about New Feature that landed on my plate last night.
- Went to bookstore and to library at lunch to look for reference book to help with New Feature. (Didn't find a copy at either place, though.)
- Even got LUNCH at lunch.
- Wrote list of things-we've-tested for meeting. Wasn't needed, but I wrote it & was ready.
- Found some old demo code that will help build New Feature.
- Figured out a workaround that fixes a key test application we need. (For days it has been crashing immediately upon start.)
- Failed to take ANYBODY'S head off. Didn't even bring an axe to work.

That may be about it.

Comments

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

just... broke.

Ouch. That doesn't sound good at all. I wish you strength and peace as you gear up for another year. *hugs*.

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I am hoping my decision to take some training in Radical Counseling turns out to be a good one. (10 full weekends over the next 10 months or so, with homework and reading in between--eep!). It does mean that there won't be time for me to, say, join a choir. But I think that the structure, as well as the community support and "claiming" this work for ME will all be really good for me. But I can already see several potential trainwrecks in the schedule, and I'm going to have to be very assiduous about getting support from the rest of the family. (Someone else is going to be taking Allegra out to sell cookies on opening weekend of booth sales next spring, for instance!)

What feeds you, CJ? What can you do that brings more energy and joy into your life than it takes out of it? Some of your former answers can't work anymore, so you have to find some new ones. What feeds your soul NOW, and what thing that *doesn't* are you going to jettison to make room for it? Be a little selfish. The world won't end, and in fact, since you'll be happier, everyone else will be too. (And yes, I AM holding up a mirror while I say all that--which, as you can imagine, is tricky to do while typing! ;^)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Good luck with the Radical Counseling training. It does seem like it will be right up your alley.

What feeds you, CJ?

I haven't found new answers to this yet. ALL of the previous answers, with the possible exception of "kittens", are now invalid. It's a real problem.

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

Do you have any draw to or ability with music? I'm wondering if there's any way to move from the dance into something that doesn't hurt you.

Kittens: Get into rescue work? Foster kittens? There's a gal around the corner from us who does kitten-fostering for a local shelter. And I have a friend who does Bernese Mountain Dog rescue, and another who does Mickaboo parrot rescue.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Drawing, no, but quilting maybe, and music quite possibly as long as no one ever wants to hear it. I've had my quota of being judged in this life. Baking, too, as long as I don't have to serve it to anyone who'd measure it against some standard. Those could be good.

How about you? Music, I'm sure! What else?

I've fostered kittens before but that really requires a time commitment, which sadly I can't make. (Heck, I don't have the time to own a dog.) My three adult cats do bring sunshine to my life though. Some days they're all that gets me through!

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

With music, you might consider a community college or city-sponsored class. I've known of some nice women's round circles, as well. The sort of thing where you can join in with others but there's no pressure to perform or be judged at all.

In fact, with the quilting or the baking, you could do the same thing. Take a community college level class, something with no grades.

Me? Lots of stuff, but I've found it hard to get out of the house because I've been so bloody overwhelmed most of the time that I just collapse when I have time. And do too much LJ. ;^) Seriously, though, if I do nothing else, I will read fantasy novels. If I can motivate out of the house, I like doing dancing (Contra, Irish, etc). Water Exercise was great at Cal, but the local class SUCKS. I need to investigate whether Castro Valley has something that would work. klrmn and I are thinking of investigating Curves and making a pact to get both of us some exercise. AFAIC, that's a really good use of poly. :^D I tried a belly dance class here in town, but it didn't work out; again, I need to check out Contra Costa.

Speaking of dancing, there was an awesome class I heard about where the instructor taught specifically for people with mobility issues. People were dancing in chairs, or in wheelchairs, or on the ground, etc. I wonder if you could find someone to teach something like that near you?

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Fortunately for my time budget and my wallet budget, I don't think I need more classes in any of these. I honestly can't remember how many years of piano, clarinet, and voice... wheeeeee! What I really need to do is apply butt to piano bench. Joining some kind of chorus would be worth considering if I get my voice back into shape. And I could enjoy baking for square dancers and random friends.

I've been so bloody overwhelmed most of the time that I just collapse when I have time.

Oh yes, me too! Time and energy. It's all about carving out the time and energy from a finite budget. Honestly, I do know that this mountain I'm under is of my own making. It's up to me to unmake it.

Who are your favorite authors? Y'know, just for fun?

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

(nod) When I was thinking of classes, I was thinking more of group performance things, like orchestra or chorus, than individual instruction. But it sounds like you may be in a similar position to myself. My singing skills, for instance, are good enough to be semi-professional, but not really quite fully professional, so I get very unsatisfied with the things I can do that don't require more time than I can give to them. It can be frustrating.

With regard to baking, simplykimberly took a class on cake decorating, and my friend foxglove999 did Culinary school. I'm pretty sure that some of the culinary places will let folks audit classes. I could imagine it being worthwhile to study how to make fancy french pastries or something. Yum!

But of course all that takes time and energy, so back to square one. ;^P

Favorite authors, lessee... I'm on a Marion Zimmer Bradley kick right now, re-reading old favorites and a few I missed over the years. Other favorites include Mercedes Lackey, Anne McCaffrey (have you read the one she co-authored with her son, or the one he wrote alone?), Charles de Lint (if I'm up for "urban fantasy"; it can be a bit depressing and too realistic sometimes), Terry Pratchett, Andre Norton (her old stuff mostly), Ursula LeGuin (though she can take more energy than I've had recently), some Piers Anthony (though I can't read more than one or two of those at a go; they get too repetitive), Jacqueline Carey, Ray Bradbury (bordering on too much horror for me on occasion), Sharon Green's "Blending" Series, Ellen Kushner, many others.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

A class on fancy French pastries would be stunningly wonderful. Mmmmmm! Next time I'm out of a job! (I really should save up all these "next time I'm out of a job" ideas.)

Piers Anthony drives me bananas but the rest of those sound great. I have read very little Jacqueline Carey or Sharon Green. Ever read Katharine Kerr's "Deverry" series? I'm working my way through that one again, and I adore it. What a rich tapestry of story-threads!

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

Yes, I've read some of the Deverry series and really liked it. I think I got to about book 5 or 6, and then I fell out of touch with the gal I was borrowing them from. Thanks for reminding me of it. I should look for it at the library.

And yeah, I get it about Piers Anthony. I can only read so much, and only certain series. I like the first few books of Xanth, for instance.

The Kushiel series is really tasty; highly worth the read. I haven't read anything other than the Blending series by Greene, and I've heard some of her other stuff is not as good.

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Oh THAT'S right, Kushiel == Jacqueline Carey! Yes, I liked those books. (I have read only the first three. I hear there is now at least one more.)

One "guilty pleasure" of mine is young adult fantasy. It's not as rich or deep, but it's just as creative and whimsical. I wonder how much of Lackey's work would count as being aimed at young adults. Tamora Pierce is good in this genre. I'll read any of hers I can get my hands on.

I'll have to go look for Blending. Thanks!

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

Young adult: Yeah, LOTS of Lackey's work counts there. Have you read any of Diana Wynn Jones' work? I read a bunch of her stuff earlier this year and loved it. Dogsbody and Witch Week are two titles.

I have the new Kushiel book. It appears to be part one in a series about Prince Imriel, Phaedre's fosterling. Very tasty. Want more. Would consider loaning it to you if we could figure out an easy transfer. :^)

And have you read any of the Ghatti's Tale books? If not, you should. Telepathic cat species. Think Lackey, but cats. Yummy. I also recommend "The Wild Road," a singleton fantasy cat book. I wish there were more.

Don't think I've read any Tamora Pierce yet. Will go look at that. :^)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Nope, don't think I've read Diana Wynn Jones. Yes, definitely the Ghatti's Tale ones. Isn't "The Golden Cat" a sequel to "The Wild Road"? I bet you'd like that one. Also "Tailchaser's Song" by Tad Williams.

I am so glad we got into this conversation! :-)

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

Ah, yes, I haven't yet read "Tailchaser's Song." I should put that on my must read list. :^) I like Tad Williams. I think you're right about "The Golden Cat," but I think it's still on my Amazon list, and I've never actually read it. Not sure. I might have gobbled that one up too, and am just wishing there were many more. :^)

More excellent YA: "Wise Child" and "Juniper" by Monica Furlong. Apparently also concluded in "Colman" which I've not yet read. "Colman" is co-authored by Karen Cushman, whose books "Midwife's Apprentice" and "Catherine, Called Birdy" are also EXCELLENT. More books by both authors on Amazon, and I'm sure the others are equally good.