Time for a shift of focus

[cjsmith]

OK, that last post was a much-desired, somewhat overdue, and probably even necessary bout of self-pity. I do need to let the grumpy out from time to time. And yes, the facts I wrote there are true. On the other hand, there's also more to life than that. I need to learn how to live with the fact that this sucks and uncurable pain is the pits. By that I mean I want to live well, not just grit my teeth and exist for one more day. It can be done. I know it can. I've seen people far worse off than me do it.

Y'know what always,

always,

always helps me?

Doing something nice for somebody else.

Those gratitude list things are okay for a quick change of focus, but for me, shifting my gaze away from myself is a far more lasting respite. As of right now, I'm pulling my head outta where it was and looking around. It'll help me for sure, and who knows, someone else might get something out of it too. :-)

Comments

[mactavish.livejournal.com]

Absolutely. In 12-step groups, "service" is considered to be a tool to getting better, to getting out of one's own head, and though I'm fairly separate from that now, it's a useful skill. It's hard for me to be thinking about myself and helping out at the same time. (Actually, it's not hard. If I choose to, I can think about how good I am for helping people, but that's truly not my instinct, and I usually get distracted from my own issues while I'm helping others.)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Ah interesting, I didn't know this was also a key point in 12-step groups. It sure is helpful for me.

It's hard for me to be thinking about myself and helping out at the same time.

Yes, that's my experience too. (Unless, as you say, I'm doing it for the ego boost -- but that's not the point.)