Giving to the future

[cjsmith]

I was just watching my neighbor pull into his driveway. Two energetic children tumbled out of the van, and Daddy made sure to get something brightly-colored from the back seat. He was in business attire complete with tie, so it was clear he'd picked up the children on his way home from work.

All those little things that go along with parenting, I thought. He picked them up; he's carrying that tote bag or whatever into the house for them. They may never consciously remember that he did this today.

I realize raising a family is one of those things that give meaning to people's lives. What's his purpose, today? The point of his life? In part, it's to work in many ways small and large to ensure his children get food and schooling and whatever else they'll need. In a way, parents are producing something for later. Their work lays a foundation for people who will (hopefully) outlive them. I could look at it as seeking immortality, I suppose. I could look at it as selfish promotion of one's own genes. Today I choose to see it as giving to the future.

Some people give to the future through innovation. The more inventions are made today, the more choices and possibilities are available for people tomorrow. Some people give to the future through their day jobs: teaching, for example, or working for the environment, or building roads. Some people discover a polio vaccine or write classic plays. Some set up scholarship funds.

I want to give to the future. And I haven't. My day job, when I had one, didn't even give to the present. I won't be raising a family. I want to think more about the ways I'd like to give to the future.

Is giving to the future important to you? If so, what ways are meaningful to you?

Comments

[dawnd.livejournal.com]

Thank you for this perspective on parenting as giving to the future. It actually made me cry. Sometimes I lose track of that aspect of it, mired in the day to day grind of messy rooms and cat pee and impossible-to-coordinate schedules. I'll probably mark this entry as a memory, in fact, to remind me of it later, since I'm sure I'll forget again.

Regarding your giving to the future: I think you do it some already, though it's a bit more subtle. In calling the dances that you do, for instance, you create memories and possibly even fitness for many other people. It's a form of teaching, though not as obvious as, say, reading to kindergartners. Do you reduce, reuse and recycle? Try to maintain your vehicles (including planes) in good working order, to maximize gas mileage? That's another way you're giving to the future, by reducing waste now.

Regarding what ways are important to me to "give to the future": Well, obviously, trying my damndest to be a good parent for Allegra (and to a much lesser degree at this point, Victoria), to at least not leave her with the SAME woundings I got from my childhood, if I can possibly manage it. Other ways include the discussion groups we host, and the coaching we do--trying to give others the benefit of some of our hard knocks, in a way. And of course the book Akien is writing (and I will be editing, mostly) is another way of disseminating that same knowledge base. Even the PPPs can be seen as giving to the future, in the same terms that I mentioned for your calling above--they create memories for many people, for instance. And there have been several relationships started at those events, so I suppose that's another way.