Tidbits

indyansel, I don't believe this! They're awesome! They arrived in styrofoam with an ice pack. And you knew I liked dark! How'd you know/remember that??

apparentparadox, that pillow thing is a GODSEND. I used it all day yesterday and I'm using it now.

The long-acting local is definitely all gone now. It's interesting learning how to get around without letting either forefoot touch ANYTHING. I am realizing how much easier things would be with one good leg, particularly in the bathroom. But I'm still glad I don't have to go through surgery twice!

I suspect, as ouchy as this is, that I have it easy in the post-surgical pain department. After all, at the bottom of the incision just coincidentally happens to be a spot where I don't have a nerve any more.

Since the local's worn off I can feel my toes... most of them. On each foot there is a spot I will never feel again, and let me just say right now that is the weirdest sensation I have experienced in thirty-seven years on this earth. It's not half so freaky when I know it's an anaesthetic. This is ME; this is how my body is, forever. A local is also, somehow, not quite as complete a loss of sensation. I touch these toes with my fingers and it's like they're not there at all. Someone substituted plastic toes. Except that the other side of each toe is there. At that point my brain segfaults. It simply cannot make sense of the input it is getting.

For some reason I am still thinking of all this as a grand adventure.

Snippets of memory

While on the phone with my parents just now I suddenly got another piece of memory back. In the OR, heading out, I asked at least twice to check that the camera came with me. It was Rob's and I wanted to make sure it got back to him. I must have been conscious of the fact that it wasn't with the rest of my stuff and could conceivably be left behind.

Come to think of it, I think I asked at least once (maybe more) about that camera while in recovery, too. I was definitely not all there. :) Heck, when I got home one of the people I phoned was joedecker, and that evening I IM'd him and said "I don't remember whether or not I called you... just wanted to check in." I really didn't remember. Now I have some memory of that phone call, but at that time I didn't. Several times that day I told rfrench something about the nurse or the inprocessing or something and he gently reminded me he'd been there when it happened.

I want the rest of my memories back. I suspect I won't ever piece all of it together, not by a long shot, but I can wish.