How not to give a cat an injection

[cjsmith]

1. Do not forget to pick up a sharps container. I do not care if your crock pot is both sterilizable and sturdy.

2. When you pull the cap off the needle, do not twitch and stab your own finger so hard that the needle gets bent.

3. When drawing insulin out of the bottle into the needle, do not flick the syringe with a fingertip like the vet-tech did to get air bubbles out of it. You are not a trained professional. A needle knocked against the inside of the bottle and angled off at thirty or forty degrees to the syringe does not help anyone.

4. Yes, you do have to find the cat. Preferably now.

5. Do not put her favorite treats down in the middle of the floor. I know this may come as a shock to you, but soon she is going to want to leave. Try putting the treats in a corner.

6. This would be a good time to chase off the snitty alpha cat who steals treats.

7. But don't scare the cat you're trying to inject.

8. If you are going to take a long time to mess about with the plunger to see you're not in a vein, make sure the cat has enough treats to keep her occupied. Or else dedicate one of your hands to keeping hold of her. A cat traipsing through the house with a needle hanging off her shoulder is only funny later.

9. Now is a bad time to faint.

10. When disposing of the needle afterwards, do not stab yourself again. Are you sure you're allowed out in public unsupervised?

Comments

[juverna.livejournal.com]

Oy!

[lkeele.livejournal.com]

Dammit, girlfriend, I wish I was there to give her shots. I know how you feel about needles. Wouldn't we make a good medical team? I could give her shots, and if she started to bleed, you could take over. :)

[tattermuffin.livejournal.com]

oh dear!! Is your finger ok?

Time to come up with a way of giving insulin by mouth I think!

[ericainohio.livejournal.com]

*snicker behind hand* Sorry, I'm not laughing at you. But I am. :-D

I cannot imagine what a pain in the ass this is. You are a good cat mommy.

[dafydd.livejournal.com]

Awwww! :(

If I were down there, I'd teach you how to play with needles... :-)

[palecur.livejournal.com]

The first person to figure that one out is going to rake in a eerily large pile of money. Peptides don't fare well in the intestinal tract. Not that it doesn't stop people from trying, mind, because a convoy of dump trucks full of money is a powerful incentive ;)

[perfect-autumn.livejournal.com]

awww

[quasigeostrophy.livejournal.com]

Sharps container handy?

[dizzdvl.livejournal.com]

To put the needles in when they have been used.

[dizzdvl.livejournal.com]

You are a good kitty mommy! I would have to bribe my sister to do that. I don't like needles.

[quasigeostrophy.livejournal.com]

Actually, my comment was asking if she had one, because I completely missed that part of the post when I first read it.

[theoctothorpe.livejournal.com]

Oh, gods! I read that half in horror, and half in hysterics.

Perhaps kevlar gloves would be appropriate?

[hitchhiker.livejournal.com]

awwww - hope you both got through that without too much residual trauma!

[just-cyd.livejournal.com]

makeshift sharps container = emptied out liquid laundry detergent bottle, if you happen to use liquid laundry detergent. my gramma did that for years. don't know about disposal, though.

and ***big hugs*** to you. i can't even begin to imagine how rough this must be. i'm only choking down pills :( i'd be there in a flash to help, but i can't find the damn keys to the teleporter...

[hnybny.livejournal.com]

Seems we're allowed to dispose of sharps in a closed, thick-walled plastic container. At least that's what my bet told us.

[rampling.livejournal.com]

Ohhhh, *HUGS*! Good for you (and Duchess) for hanging in there....

And I thought giving tortoises injections was a pain in the ass ...

[allanh.livejournal.com]

OMFG PLEASE STOP! I'm HURTING, I'm laughing so hard.

(Envisioning a desert tortoise dragging a syringe sticking out of its shoulder around the yard, and bursting into laughter again.)

(CLUMP. *drag* CLUMP.*drag* ...)

Oh.

My.

Thank you.

I know this isn't the reaction other people probably thought you were aiming for, but I thought this was hysterically funny ... and on a HIGHLY depressing, icky m*o*v*i*n*g day, this was EXACTLY what I needed when I sat down for a break from packing.

My internal six year old thanks your internal six year old.

[wiping eyes again] Oh DEAR....

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Works for me! :)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

It was indeed intended to be funny! Most of these are goofs I made once, early on, and haven't repeated. I added a new goof this morning - taking the cap off in such a way that I bent the needle right then and had to toss it immediately. (Dang those needles are fragile and those caps are tight.)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

It's fine now. The needles are narrow... and annoyingly fragile! That's a goof I made a week ago. (All of these are goofs I've made once and haven't repeated!)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

It's OK to laugh. It's intended to be funny. :)

Thank you - that's the nicest offer I've had all day. I'll get better at it on my own, just... more slowly!

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Oh, I have one now. This set of goofs was collected over the space of a week and a half. But my crock pot did have to suffice for a while!

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

I don't either. My sister's arms aren't long enough though ;-) (she's in Boston).

I'm getting better. I figured I should record these goofs for people's amusement, and for my own later hilarity, before I started to forget them!

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you laughed. I hoped it would be funny. I think cement gloves might be a good start! ;-)

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

Thanks! At least I haven't made all these goofs all at once. I collected them over about ten days. :)