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Unified Theory of Cats
These recent discoveries explain an awful lot:
- A stray cosmic ray can cause a cat to attack an air molecule.
- Electromagnetic disturbances may cause all cats in a room to sit or lie in the same position*.
- Eddies in the air currents around a cat's body, if they brush the whiskers just right, will cause a cat's brain to reboot completely. All unsaved data is lost.
These represent tremendous breakthroughs in the field of feline cognition (aka What Is On Your Little Tiny Mind?). More research is needed. Give generously to the CJ Smith Feline Cognition Research Foundation**.
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*...so get out your tinfoil hat when this happens. It may be the only indicator you have. Be prepared!
** CJSFCRF***.
*** Hey, the cats can pronounce it.
- A stray cosmic ray can cause a cat to attack an air molecule.
- Electromagnetic disturbances may cause all cats in a room to sit or lie in the same position*.
- Eddies in the air currents around a cat's body, if they brush the whiskers just right, will cause a cat's brain to reboot completely. All unsaved data is lost.
These represent tremendous breakthroughs in the field of feline cognition (aka What Is On Your Little Tiny Mind?). More research is needed. Give generously to the CJ Smith Feline Cognition Research Foundation**.
_____________________________
*...so get out your tinfoil hat when this happens. It may be the only indicator you have. Be prepared!
** CJSFCRF***.
*** Hey, the cats can pronounce it.
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