Favorite story along these lines. Friend was getting a needle biopsy of something in her breast. The doc assured her it wouldn't hurt much, yet it did, and he had the temerity to argue with her about it. She asked tartly, "When's the last time you had it done?" He said his professor in medical school told him it didn't hurt. She replied acidly "And when's the last time HE had it done?" Apparently the guy shut up at that point.
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Re: OK, so now I KNOW I'm not totally insane.