Wanted: tinfoil hat

This morning I heard garbage trucks on my street, and I realized that yet again I had forgotten to put out the trash and recycling bins. I raced to do it; maybe I was early enough for one or the other.

Every week I think "I'll remember next week" and every week, it seems, I forget. I'll think of it Wednesday morning, but forget when I get home from work. It's as if my mind goes into a zombie pit of uselessness every Wednesday night.

I bet that's when the aliens beam their mind control rays over southern Sunnyvale. Now that I know what time they do it, I have a better chance of protecting myself.